i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
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