I didn't shave. On purpose
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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