Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize