Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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