just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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