I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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