i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Holy sore nipples Batman
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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