The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You took a bar mat shot.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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