There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
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chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
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I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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