Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
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It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
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bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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