Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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