i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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