he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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