He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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