the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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