Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize