So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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