well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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