i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize