Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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