I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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