The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize