I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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