I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Randomize