Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize