Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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