I think i peed on brittanys purse
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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