Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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