i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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