four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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