When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize