So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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