I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize