I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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