Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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