I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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