It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize