I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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