did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize