The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He passed out mid-signature
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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