I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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