Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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