so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I love you.
Bad choice
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