he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize