are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Let's paint friendship bongs
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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