i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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