Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize