Grow some girl-balls and come out already
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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