they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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