What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
how can u be prego again
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize